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The Most Effective Cockroach Killer Ever
Cockroaches are a problem, but they’re not a problem that always requires an exterminator. There are times when you’re going to want to bring in the big guns, but unless you’ve reached the point of initiating Depth Com 5, then most problems can be taken care of on your own.
I’ve seen some pretty crazy traps in the past, but the most effective traps are the ones that I’ve seen are surprisingly simple. The most effective trap I’ve ever witnessed was so simple that anyone with a large bowl can do it themselves.
I lived in Japan for a couple of years as an English teacher. It was a wonderful experience where I got to experience a completely different culture and learn a new language. If you don’t have anything tying you down here, I highly recommend living in Japan yourself for a time. There is a lot more to Japan than video games and anime, and, despite what your local weaboo might say, not everyone in Japan actually likes anime. That being said, there were some aspects about living in Japan that weren’t all that wonderful. Most of the time you could get away from the less desirable situations in the comfort of your own apartment; that is if your apartment is comfortable.
There was no comfort for me there. The apartment that I lived in was a disaster. From a bathroom that hadn’t been cleaned in over a year to a cracked window that would let the rain in, my apartment was a pretty bad place to live if you’re used to the typical living conditions most of us are used to. But we could clean the bathroom, which we did, and we could MacGyver something to patch up the window. The one thing we couldn’t really deal with easily was the colony of cockroaches that had infested our home.
For about a month, we were blissfully unaware that we had a roach infestation. But we were not alone. From the shadows, the tiny devils watched and waited. I don’t know if they were studying us, but when they finally revealed themselves, they were very hard to deal with.
We tried everything we could to get rid of the little brown creatures. We left poisonous crumbs where we knew they gathered. We left roach hotels in every corner we could think of. We even set up an elaborate trap where a gas bomb was set up on a hair trigger to trip at the slightest movement. Nothing worked though. The poison crumbs were left untouched. The roach hotels were left completely vacant. The gas bomb was left un-tripped.
Clearly we were not dealing with ordinary roaches. These guys most likely had learned how to survive from the last tenants, the same people who left the bathroom unattended for a year. We were going to have to get creative.
Sure, we could have called an exterminator, but we didn’t know Japanese very well at the time and didn’t want to accidentally order a pizza with roaches on top. We also didn’t want to call our supervisor. We were worried that we would come across as whiney and were sacred that we would lose our jobs. So, we spent a week coming up with a plan to rid ourselves of these six-legged demons.
I don’t remember everything that went into the plan, but I do remember that it involved a hamster wheel and a series of conveyer belts and ropes. After we were done, my roommate, a fellow teacher, and I realized just how impossible the plan was, and threw it out.
Then, inspiration struck like a match igniting an unaware cockroach. We laughed at how simple it would be. Maybe there was a mix of exhaustion and desperation in that laugh as well. I don’t really remember.
The next morning we set a large bowl in the middle of the floor of our kitchen. We put a cup, upside-down, in the middle of that bowl and filled the bowl with water. Then, we placed a spoonful of sugar on top of the cup and left for work.
After the school day ended, we came home and examined out trap. To our delight, shock and awe, we saw a mass of roach corpses floating in the bowl. I counted out 26 cadavers. We accomplished with a bowl of water and some sugar what a series of traps and poison had failed to do as advertised. We had cleaned our home of cockroaches.
Just to be safe, we set our trap a few more times. But after that day, the roaches were never a problem again.
By Andrew Whittaker
Andrew is a graduate of Utah Valley University’s Creative Writing Program. He enjoys writing articles that people find companies and services such as exterminators, Salt Lake City. In his free time, Andrew likes to write fantasy.